Tag Archives: setting boundaries

Setting Boundaries for Happiness

By: Gloria Marie

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This may sound silly, but, have you ever felt overwhelmed? At the end of the day, do you ever think, where has this day gone? You may not be setting some boundaries and you may be letting whatever comes your way take your attention. Try these 3 steps and begin setting boundaries for happiness.

If you do not have boundaries, you can be like a sponge and take on other people’s feelings, tasks and problems. I am all for helping others compassionately, but, not if it means I take on everyone’s feelings and problems. With defined space, you will know who or what you allow into your inner circle and life.

1. Take a large sheet of paper and draw a circle in the middle of it. In the circle, write or draw all you desire to have, do, and/or manifest in your life. Include what brings you happiness. What friends or family members are in your inner circle?

2. Now on the outside of the circle, write or draw what might prevent you from achieving what you want in your inner circle. What are the people, distractions, or events that can sideline you or rob you of your time? The outside of the circle are people or things that you are only willing to experience by “invitation” only.

3. If you have trouble defining your boundaries, ask yourself the following questions:
a. Am I taking a stand for what I believe?
b. Am I defining who I am rather than being defined by others?
c. Am I honoring my time?
d. Do I always say “yes?”
e. Do I put my work and interests always last?

This exercise will help you define what you are willing to do and what you won’t do. It will help you get a sense of your SELF!

Setting Boundaries

By: Gloria Marie

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If you have trouble setting boundaries, you need to watch this video. Are you ever torn between what you want to do and what you “should” do? Try these three steps mentioned in the video

Setting boundaries can be difficult in some areas of our lives. You may have no trouble with boundaries at work or with your children. How about boundaries with your family members or with friends? Or most important; boundaries with yourself? It is essential to be aware of and establish personal boundaries with ourselves, only then can we set boundaries with others. I equate it to the oxygen mask on planes. The flight attendant says, “Place the mask over your face before placing the mask with any children you are traveling with”.

If we begin with ourselves then, it will be easier to establish other boundaries in our lives. By doing this you will empower yourself and become more confident. This will give you self-fulfillment and then you can freely give of yourself to others: your children, your family, and your friends. It is like putting gas in the tank of your car. If there is no gas, the car stops. If “your tank” is empty, it is hard to lead a happy, peaceful life.

Sometimes we feel guilty for doing things for ourselves or taking time for ourselves. There are all the “shoulda’” and “have to dos”. We get stuck in routines at work and at home. We go on autopilot and before we know it, we are exhausted and drained.

This week’s exercise is to create a “Boundary” for you.

1. Pick something that you enjoy doing: meditating, playing music, exercising, or reading. Have it something you look forward to doing, not something that is guilt driven.
2. Schedule this activity for 30 minutes to 1 hour each day for the next week. Put it on your calendar.
3. If you have children or roommates, put a “Do Not Disturb” sign on your door. This is your special time to renew and refresh your soul.

By empowering yourself to do this, it will carry over into other parts of your life.

What did you put on your schedule?