Tag Archives: fear

5 Ways to Survive the Holiday Season

By: Gloria Marie

survive the holiday season, stress, single happy strong

There are so many commitments and expectations this time of year, in addition to your normal, daily responsibilities. It is easy to get caught up in the “should” instead of what you would really like to do. When I get caught up in the should, I find that I miss the very essence of the holiday season. Try these 5 ways to survive the holiday season, I know I am going to put them into practice. You can survive and actually enjoy the season.

1. Go with the Flow – When the unexpected happens or your plans go awry, do not resist what is happening, go with the flow. It is probably out of your control anyway, so, why stress. I had a friend call me last week on her way to the airport. The traffic was horrendous and she was afraid she was going to miss her flight. Instead of stressing, she knew there was nothing she could do about it, she took a deep breath and surrendered the need to control the outcome. Our initial instinct would be to have our minds race with all possible scenarios, usually negative ones. Instead, just go with the flow. She ended up making the flight!
2. Check Off One Item on Your to Do List – If you look over that list, there is probably one item you can remove. Usually that item is at the bottom of the list anyway. Ask yourself, if it is important to get it done or is it just kind of nice to get it done?
3. Exercise – Any type of exercise, even a brisk walk will relieve stress and help clear your mind at the same time. When I am busy, it is very easy for me to find every excuse in the world to not exercise, when that is probably the one thing that would be the most beneficial.
4. Do Something Special for Someone – This helps to get the emphasis off “YOU!” It could be a simple as making a phone call to someone you have not talked to. Or sending an unexpected gift or card to someone.
5. Do Something Special for Yourself – Take time to nurture yourself in whatever way that is. Celebrate yourself at this special time of year. You deserve it.

Full of Fear

By: Gloria Marie

divorce advice, fear, divorce women, single women, divorce

My son was recently home on spring break. He loves watching all sorts of sports and on this one particular day he was watching a soccer match on television. I began to make lunch for us and suddenly I felt full of fear and stressed. Ignoring my own advice, I kept telling myself that it was nothing. What could I be stressed about? My son was home and it was wonderful for us to be together.

After a few more minutes, I realized that the soccer game on the television was really annoying me. It made no sense. We ate our lunch and after lunch, I decided I needed some quiet time to “be” with my feelings of fear. What was it about the soccer game that I was reacting to?

After a few minutes, it dawned on me. The light bulb went off in my head. Several summers ago, I was not working and money was really tight. We were living in Florida and it was a very HOT summer. Because money was tight, I kept the air conditioner on about 80 degrees, really not comfortable. That summer was difficult for many reasons. It was also the summer of the world championship for soccer. Whenever my son was not working, he was watching soccer.

Fast track to this spring break, when he was watching soccer, my mind and my body reverted back to that challenging summer several years ago. It was a relief when I figured it out. It reminded me of the behavior modification work of B.F. Skinner and the rats that I learned about in college. However, I am not a rat and I can change the way I react.

I vowed to change that pattern. The past was over and we now have our air conditioning on a very comfortable level and life is really good!