There are many titles that I can refer to myself: mother, author, entrepreneur, life coach, spiritual seeker. But, the one I am most proud of is SURVIVOR! Luckily, I cannot see into the future because if I would have known what the last ten years were going to be like, I may have just hibernated in my bathrobe in my house.
Ten years ago, I had the idyllic suburban life. I was married for 21 years, had two sons and a Labrador. My life was ruled by soccer games, swim meets, and the ever-trustworthy crock pot. We spent the summers in the mountains and the school year in Florida. Then little by little everything changed, and the spiral began.
It began with a lawsuit over a business my husband and I built from scratch and sold to a publicly held company. No need to go into all the details, the sad conclusion was that they did not honor the contract and we lost over $2 million. Life changer for sure.
In the following years: my husband filed for divorce (yes there was another women), first my oldest son and then the younger son went to college, and my beloved lab died. I did not receive the court ordered alimony, so, in my fifties, I had to find a career and a way to support myself and my son. It was darn scary. When I first separated, I did not have a car or a credit card; they were taken away from me. There were years of unemployment and underemployment. I even lost my home. Sometimes I had less than $50 in my checking account. Life was about providing food and shelter for myself and my one son that lived with me. Think Neiman Marcus to Goodwill. It was rock bottom, or at least I thought it was.
The one constant support I had was my Mother. Through this period, she was diagnosed with cancer and died a short six weeks later. Many days, I dreaded getting out bed. When the phone rang, I would cringe expecting more bad news. I knew that all these problems and crises had my name on them and I was determined to become a survivor, get through them, and create a new life filled with love, happiness, and abundance. It was up to me.
It was not a straight road to my new life, there were detours, and some days I will admit too much chardonnay. Not only was I searching for a career, but I also had to learn how to date again in my fifties. My frantic search for a relationship resulted in over 300 first dates. Online dating was amazing and at the same time, like a job (or job interviews). The dating thing was all part of me just trying to figure out how to build a new life.
I had to start over from scratch, but, I learned wisdom, kindness, and resilience and turned challenges into victories. When I developed faith instead of living in fear, my life gradually changed for the better. I am now happy, at peace, my bills are paid, and abundance continues to flow into my life. I learned to trust in God and to expect miracles.
No matter how bleak your life is now, it can be changed. The strategies that worked for me will work for you. Think possibilities, not impossibilities. Have faith in yourself and the Universe. Create the magnificent life that you deserve. Become a survivor. Let my courage inspire you.
“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Maybe I was forced down that road, but, I will never look back!
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